Posted in Journal

Staying Sane, Staying Light

Every time I am done with a large deadline, I feel an enormous wave of calm wash over me, as if all my worries were over for the rest of my life. Of course, I am well aware that they are not, but somehow my brain shuts down negativity and allows myself to indulge in social media without any shade of guilt-tripping. I am riding on one such a small high at the moment.

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Posted in Musings, Verses

Infinite

I didn’t have enough words in me to capture that moment. So I wondered, why not capture it as it is.

One of those rare moments of clarity when the world falls away and all that remains is a feeling of silent awe of being here, in the present moment, as part of something infinite.

Posted in Musings

Procrastination

Calm.

As it settles comfortably around my chest, I feel a mix of relief and fear. This is all too familiar – taking a break and lying in bed, letting the mails crowd my inbox without breaking into my head. I know I’m going to regret this morning spent purely on printed words and dialogues speeding at 1.25x. I know I’d ask myself in another two days as deadlines overwhelm me why I spent an entire hour listening to the little yellow clock ticking away next to me as I contemplated how to fill the rest of my day. Why, I’d certainly be exasperated by even just the end of the day when I realise I’ve forgotten to send 2 out of 4 emails as promised to a colleague and watch the sky darken with her foul mood and indifferent texts.

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Posted in Journal

Breath

I notice MB’s body stir in the darkness as he wakes. I will mine to move, and deposit myself squarely on top of him, arms and legs on the side, my head resting against his chest, like a baby clinging on. He checks a couple of chats before setting the phone aside and bringing his arms around, in something of a loose hug.

We lie in silence. I feel my body and spirits raise with every breath of his. This was home. This felt right.

I let the calm slowly spread across my heart.